Get off the toilet it’s Bathroom Fashion Week

Bathroom Fashion Week header

I have watched fashion designers take the lowly pajama and redesign it in expensive fabric with intricate trim and tailoring meant to be worn outdoors. When I first saw this unfortunate fashion folly a few seasons ago, I knew designers were desperate for ideas. I wouldn’t be caught dead walking out of my home in pj’s, no matter how tailored or beautiful the ensemble.

Last week during New York Fashion Week, there were a few ensembles that took pajamas to a new level, that is, by way of the bathroom.

Is “Bathroom Chic” the new thing? The average person spends a great deal of time in the restroom. Men easily spend up to one hour a day reading and grunting. Women apply makeup, blow out their hair and melt their stress in the bath tub with balmy scented candles.

It's Bathroom Fashion Week - from the toilet to the tarmac

Phew! I am so happy designers are really  thinking about business women dashing pell-mell to a business meeting. Left:  Alexander Wang via Racked.com and Thakoon – photo by Yannis Vlamos via Vogue.com.

The Elder Statesman 2015 NY Fashion Week

Awwww, how cute. His-and-her bathroom runway fashion. Designed by The Elder Statesman – photo by Thomas Giddings via Vogue.com.

AND MY ABSOLUTE FAVE…

Tia Cibani NY Fashion Week September 2015.

The pioneer of Bathroom Fashion is Tia Cibani. Photo courtesy of Tia Cibani via Vogue.com.

What do you think is all over Tia Cibani’s model’s face? Face cream or some must-have Korean face mask? I saw only one thing: COCAINE.

Funny, drugs never go out of style. But I think I might have coke on the brain because I have been binge-watching Netflix’s newest series, Narcos. If you love gangs, violence and drug trafficking as much as I do, then you must see this new hit show.

(I am so obsessed with this show that I needed to add this cocaine prop to my DIY’d ‘bathroom chic’ look.)

Bathroom Fashion = cocaine

When you are getting dressed for Bathroom Fashion Week, don’t forget to do some blow.

HERE IS MY VERSION OF DIY’D ‘BATHROOM CHIC’ ON THE FLY.

Snorting coke during Bathroom Fashion Week for NY Fashion Week

Oh man that is some good shit. I just blew my entire month’s clothing allowance up my schnoz in 5 seconds.

  1. Take a taupe or oatmeal colored towel, wrap it around your head to create a wrap or turban.
  2. Create a collar with a Swiffer vacuum wipe and pin it with a pretty brooch.
  3. Create a pair of epaulettes with Swiffer Wet Mop wipes.
  4. Throw a towel across your lap preferably in a “dead moss” color.
  5. Bam! You are a stylish “Bathroom Fashion” enthusiast on the cheap.

Cocaine user during Bathroom Fashion Week

Getting back to Narcos and cocaine…

Narcos is a crime drama on Netflix documenting the rise and fall of Colombia’s biggest and wealthiest drug kingpin, Pablo Escobar, the Medellín Cartel, as well as fumbling United States DEA agents. The series details Escobar’s early years (late 1970s) to the two decade war on drugs which unleashed violence, war, terror and was responsible for killing over 4,000 people. He was renown for his ruthlessness, ran a $5B a year drug business and eventually rose to become a Congressman. Hard to fathom people would elect a thug, isn’t it? Oh wait, never mind. People elect thugs all the time, even in the good ol’ USA.

Will this show gain as much popularity as Breaking Bad, another series based on drugs? Remember when the fashion industry glamorized heroin with “heroin chic” in the 90s? Do you think “cocaine chic” will replace it and converge with “bathroom chic?”

So much uninspiring fashion is being churned out these days, packaged for Instagramming celebrities. The powers that be keep designing “landfill chic”-value items for the masses who shop at fast fashion chains.

As you may gather, my hope for fashion’s future isn’t so bright. So in the meantime I will follow the trend of bathroom fashion enthusiasts, sit in my bathrobe watching people snort powder up their nostrils on my flat screen TV.

Rest assured, I don’t condone snorting illegal substances. The wafting aroma of garlic, fresh bread, aged cheese and wine at my favorite farm-to-table restaurant, is my favorite form of inhalation.

Subscribe to RSS feed

3 Comments

  1. Bravo!!!

  2. Thank you Magda for the Narcos review – I’ve been trying to decide if I should watch it, and now I will check it out. Also, totally agree about bathroom fashion – it should stay hidden. My pet peeve about women’s robes and such is that they mostly come in pastel colors. I hate pastels!

Join in the conversation. Leave a comment.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

© 2018 PrettyCripple. All rights reserved. You do not have permission to use photos or text off this website without permission.

Theme by Anders NorenUp ↑

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox

Join other followers

Wordpress SEO Plugin by Wordpress SEO Plugin
%d bloggers like this: