I am not one for New Years’ resolutions because I don’t want to beat myself up should I fail. In the middle of last year, I needed to make healthier lifestyle changes and trim my budget.
I was spending way too much money on groceries by indulging in weekly $20 artisanal cheese rolled in ash, instead of settling for sharp Vermont cheddar or slumming it with Velveeta. I was able to cut my 2018 grocery bill by $1500 from 2017 by making mindful decisions without sacrificing too much.
For 2019, I plan to continue cutting my grocery bill as well as eating vegetarian dishes at a minimum of 6 times a week. I want to do this since there is irrefutable evidence that eating less meat and increasing vegetable intake is better for us and the environment. Additionally, I love pigs and cows too damn much. Growing up in a Polish household, pork and beef were daily staples. At this stage in my life, I feel too much guilt consuming these beautiful intelligent animals. Something has to give. Don’t get me wrong, I love to eat bacon, but there has to be a way for me to feel good without having to consume it. Veggie bacon or facon, just doesn’t cut it.
Bingo! I found the most self-evident solution. Instead of ingesting bacon, I can wear it. And not Lady Gaga style with meat hanging off my full frontal. Last month while perusing Saks.com I found the most perfect red puffer cropped jacket by the Italian brand, BACON. Yes, you read that correctly. Immediately my mouth watered, a glimmer shone in my eye and a dream bubble popped up above my head. “I am going to start wearing fake bacon dammit! I need to break my habit of pork gorging and opt for something that will make me look GREAT instead.”
The highlight of this jacket and biggest selling point is the oversized puffy collar and ribbon to fashion a bow. Of course the only possible color to order for myself is lipstick red. What else?
To make this outfit commit fully to the bacon sans-bacon theme, I topped it off with a Japanese boiled wool hat which resembles overlapped slices of bacon. Contrast this look with a pair of leopard Nanushka boots with gold heel with a carefully placed Kermit the Frog as a prop. And voila… this now qualifies as a potentially viral Instagram #VeganFashion post.
Are any of you committing to changing your diet for the better this year? If so shoot me some ideas. I know this much, I can’t deal with veganism full time. At present, cheese must remain in my dietary regimen or I won’t feel human. This deprivation could lead me to return to my old carnivorous ways.
Finally, I have to share a vegetarian recipe with you that I can’t stop devouring and sharing with people. I have never been a fan of cauliflower, but occasionally I come across a dish that deserves accolades. This Indian-style crispy cauliflower curry dish from meal delivery service Blue Apron needs to be shared. Bon Appétit mes petits cochons.
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